Monday, September 22, 2014

:: LIFE :: September | CHANGE

Let me just get this out there now... I see a therapist. And I'm damn proud of it.

For some wackadoo reason (pun intended), therapy has a long history of something to be ashamed of, or something you go to only if you're depressed or crazy. Well in that case... Hi! My name is Carrie, and I'm depressed and crazy, because I'm a HUMAN BEING. Let's face it folks, humans are nut jobs. We pump our bodies and environment full of artificial products and chemicals, then, shocked by the lethal outcome, produce more artificial products and chemicals to "resolve" the previous issue. And we think taking care of your mental state is only something you do if/when you have a mental illness... Confused much? Because I am. I would be more ashamed if I was struggling through life with low self-esteem, anger issues, lack of direction or any other number of mental blocks and not seeing a therapist because I was afraid of what people might think. Again, an issue in and of itself that you should probably be talking to someone about... Do we see the pattern?? Alas, I digress.

This post is not about my therapist and I, but a little gem of a resource that she passed along to me that I would say has probably-- nay, has definitely changed my approach to life. On one hand, I've always been fascinated by human biology & psychology, and learning how and why we function the way we do. And on the other hand, I've also always been very much into the world beyond us -- philosophy, metaphysics, astrology, energies, spirits, psychics, etc. -- anything that put us into perspective. Or rather, put us in our place. You guys, the universe is big. Like, REAL big. We're wayyyyy too tiny a piece of the puzzle to be the only piece worth looking at.

Back in March, I was going through a bit of a rough patch. I was miserable at work and trying to be successful in a life that I thought I wanted but soon realized wasn't me at all. Add to that insecurities about a fresh relationship, and it was clear my boat was not only off course, but quickly losing control in some pretty choppy waters (at least that's what I thought until I got to April and May... holy shit did those months suck). Knowing that I love anything spiritual, my therapist, whom we'll call K, shared with me The Power Path's Monthly Forecast for March. It's a shamanic website where Lena Stevens publishes an article talking about a theme for every month, and what we can expect the universe to bring us. That theme is based off of (here's where I lose a few of you) the energy of that month. In March, the theme was COMMITMENT. And every single word she wrote hit home. As they did in April, May, June, July and August. I found myself eagerly awaiting the first of each month for the forecast to be published, as if I had just finished my last ration of food the week before and was starving for spiritual nourishment. I couldn't believe how much each theme was not only completely on par with where I was personally, but also how appropriate and inspiring the guidance was. Funny how the universe works, huh? ;)

Now granted this month is almost over, but the theme for September is CHANGE. And if ever someone needed a change, it would be this girl. This year has been simultaneously the best and the worst. More on that later. But basically I've come a long way this year, in a great way, and I've been needing to capitalize on that. So in the spirit of this month, I've decided to make some major changes.

For one, returning to writing is something I'm committed to. For someone who's brain & emotions run a mile a minute, I cannot even explain the benefits if putting thoughts into writing. So bare with me while I spew my brain at you via this long forgotten blog.

Secondly, I've also committed myself to (gulp) a half marathon. Disclaimer: I AM NOT A RUNNER. But my sister is and has been running halves for the last 3 or so years. I always watched her cross that finish line in awe, thinking it was something I could never do, and now I'm training my tired ass to do the same. And it hurts. Everything. Hurts. But by god, I'm going to do this!

Lastly, I'm 5 rearrangements into an apartment redo. My tiny little studio has been good to me, so I'm returning the favor. It's always been half way there (like, all 5 times). But now that I work from home, I need my place to be a better reflection of me, and completely inspiring. So photos to come soon (hopefully...)!

via rebeccakelsey.com
So if you're reading Lena's post now and thinking, "well damn, September is almost over. I can't make any significant changes in a week," then you shut your mouth right now. It's never too late to be the person you want to be. And I'm sure if you ask Lena, she'll tell you that universe sets no deadlines on improving life. If all you do is start working towards a tiny change, you'll be primed and ready for whatever next month brings. The themes always flows seamlessly together, the next month drawing strength from that which came before it. So go do it! You can continue making progress and draw even more inspiration next month. Get out of your head and start making those changes you never thought you could. I bet you'll surprise yourself. I know I did :).

*c